10bastards

Off to Langkawi

10bastards — Fri, 23 Oct 2009 00:00:00 GMT

I had a great day on the kayaking and elephant adventure. I thought I would celebrate by having a few ales on my "last" night in Thailand. I found a bar that was pretty much populated by foreigners, but decided more fun was to be had at the Reggae bar with my friends from last time. I was handed a flyer by one of the workers, which advertised "buckets" of alcohol for around six dollars each. Seeing that this is a bit of a tradition in Thailand, I thought I would indulge. Wow. Needless to say I thought is was a great idea to go with some of the girls to another bar down the road. Three of us on a scooter, and the driver had been drinking... I somehow got dragged by some random to another bar, where I met up with some of the boys that work at the Reggae Bar. I ended up spilling the bucket belonging to what I remember as being the Thai version of Mr T. I bought him another and one for myself as well. That's about the last thing that I remember.

I woke to an incessant banging on my door at about 10.30 the next day. I packed up my stuff and headed down to the travel agency. Turns out they had tried to rouse me at the prescribed time of 0630. I never heard a thing. No refunds available, I booked myself a new bus ticket for the next day, went back to the hotel, and slept and slept. I was so surprised to wake up with my wallet and camera on my person. I have a habit of putting my wallet down the front of my pants if I'm in a dodgy area. Must have worked. Although, for the second time, I souvenired a stubbie cooler, only to have it souvenired off me in return! It was a good night (from what I recall), but I didn't eat all the next day, and am still at a loss as to how I got home safe and sound. Lucky...

I'm in Langkowie, and am enjoying a quiet night in. I'll have to start looking around here tomorrow...

Railay

10bastards — Tue, 20 Oct 2009 00:00:00 GMT

So I was well and truly over Phuket, didn't even have a big night. I had a hunger for some lapping, gentle waves, so I booked myself a minibus back to Ao Nang and a longtail boat to Railay. The change was automatic. Not quite as hustle-y, but that is probably because everything is a lot more expensive. I was disappointed with the beaches. Railay East is a mangrove swamp, and Railay West is a bay, with mud instead of sand. The second day I was there I decided to hike to Tonsai. Best idea ever! Okay, so the hike was through the jungle and I've never lost so much fluid through sweat, but the beach was awesome, the people friendly (without trying to sell anything) and the scene just so relaxing. I would stay in Tonsai the next time around, as it seems so much nicer. Railay is good, but just that little bit pricey.

I decided when I had got home (narrowly avoiding heat stroke) that I would go to Ao Phra Nang the next day and decide between the two where to stay. It was raining the next day though, so I just maxed by the pool in the afternoon and set myself for a big night out. Unfortunately it turned out to be a big, big night, which ruled me out for Ao Phra Nang (ruled me out of doing anything really). The fact that I had entered into a limbo competition and twisted my knee didn't help either. I decided with a little over a week left of my holiday to return to Ao Nang, do a tour and then set off to Langkawi. I really quite like Ao Nang. Prices are good (my room is priced for two people and is $8 Australian a night, with a bottle of water a day plus free Wifi - heaven!) and there is access to pretty much anything you could want to do. Rock climbing, kayaking, Island tours, elephant safaris, snorkelling etc, etc.

I'm booked for a kayaking tour and elephant safari tomorrow. I'm pretty excited, I figure it will be a good way to say goodbye to Thailand. The next day will see me off bright and early (0630-yuck!) on my way to Langkawi!

Karon - the beach you can't swim at.

10bastards — Wed, 14 Oct 2009 00:00:00 GMT

The "bus" I took from Ao Nang stopped at Krabi, where we had to wait for the "bus" going to Phuket. We ended up leaving at about twelve thirty, going back to Ao Nang to pick up some more people. The minibus was cramped, and I was jammed against the luggage but for $11.50 for a four hour trip - you can't complain! Or so I thought... There was a couple of French ladies who didn't stop complaining about the wait and the conditions. My late night the night before ensured I got to sleep through most of their tirade. We reached Phuket and were taken into a travel agency to confirm what hotels we were staying at. One of the staff came out to open the door of the mini-bus, a very tall, broad-shouldered woman with a definite five-o'clock shadow. Hrmm. I thought she was going to punch one of the French ladies in the head, but unfortunately that didn't happen.

My hotel was the last stop, so the driver got me to sit in the front with him. He asked if I was alone, and then started telling me about the affordability of Thai prostitutes. I assured him that was not why I was in Thailand, but he didn't believe me of course. As soon as I got to my hotel (a fash one, 20 bucks a night and warmish water!) I went to sleep. I only woke up for a little bit and then slept all night. Needless to say, I didn't see any of Karon beach on my first night...

Today I went to the beach, which pretty much sealed the deal for me going back Ao Nang way (probably to Tonsai or Railay). The waves were of a decent size, but I didn't see any surfers (???). I also saw a massive Jelly fish float by me. I got out of the water before I found a shark (I just KNOW there was one there somewhere). The beach has deck chairs and umbrellas which cost about three bucks to rent. I treated myself, but quickly lost interest, as there was a never ending stream of people selling the usual stuff like watches, umbrellas and random musical instruments. Again, a beer would have better for me, but anyway. I spent the rest of the afternoon in the pool at the resort. It was only later on I saw the sign at the beach that said "no swimming"... I thought there were some serious rips present and it turns out there was!

I think I'll head out later on and see if there is anyone OTHER than prostitutes and transvestites out tonight. I'll head to Rawai tomorrow to see what the shopping is like, then book myself a trip back to the Krabi area. Everything is pretty much the same as here, but the accommodation is cheaper, the surf better and at least five less prostitutes.

Ao Nang continued

10bastards — Wed, 14 Oct 2009 00:00:00 GMT

I decided to organise a speed boat trip to Phi Phi and other areas. This cost me $28 for the whole day, so I couldn't go wrong really. Our first stop was to snorkel at a reef. Then we went to Maya Bay, famous through the movie "The Beach". Apparently other people had heard of it as well, because there was a couple of hundred people there, and the beach itself was covered with boats. We then tripped over to Phi Phi, which I was glad we did, because it was not as amazing as I had thought it would be. We were given a nice lunch, which surprised me, as I had thought there was no way that could be included in the price. Our next stop was another coral reef. It was amazing, the fish and coral seemed to radiate a fluorescent glow. Pineapple chunks were thrown into the water, bringing fish out of nowhere. I found myself surrounded by beautiful fish attacking the pineapple (and me). It was awesome. Our last stop of the day was Bamboo Island. What a place! The water was amazingly clear and warm. I sat in the twenty-something degree water at neck height. Great stuff.

I had walked around Ao Nang, been to a bar before, but this particular night I decided to really have a go at it. There is a soi (street) that is full of bars, so I decided to go down to the one at the end - the Reggae Bar. It was like walking the gauntlet getting there. There would have been at least 40 "women" grabbing (literally) at me to go to their particular bars. Bloody hell. I parked myself at the bar and it turned out that the owner was an American. It wasn't too bad, was left to myself and chatted to the owner. It was quite interesting. He said the "girls" (again, inverted commas!) weren't paid to be there, they were given free drinks. I then played "pick the ladyboy", the owner confirming my suspicions. There were at least two in the bar, doing the rounds, playing Connect Four and Jenga with the patrons - believe it or not!

This guy, John, absolutely loves his job. He said he could run the place by himself, but had four people working for him - employed at $165 Aussie per month! I had been playing Connect Four with one of the "girls" when I spotted a group of English girls that had been on the boat trip earlier in the day. I ended up drinking and playing Jenga with them until they decided to head out with one of the lady boys to another bar. I can't imagine my favourite hang outs in Australia being frequented by transvestites. It amazes me how open they are. All you have to do is ask if they're a woman and they will confirm! I had a good night with the English ladies, and finished up getting to bed at 3.30. This did not bode well for my bus at eight, but I made it - just.

Thailand - the first few days

10bastards — Sat, 10 Oct 2009 00:00:00 GMT

I made it through customs in Krabi with no fuss, no questions. I guess I just look like a trustworthy character. Jumped on the bus from the bus to the airport to Ao Nang. My beach side destination. I would compare it to a place like Maroochydore in Australia, not too busy, not too quiet. The place I'm staying at said it was directly across from the McDonalds, where the bus stopped, but it still took me an hour to find it. That was probably due to me having a different name for the place in my head. It's ten bucks a night, so no breaking the bank, it has a fan and a queen size bed. It must be hot all the time in this area, because there is no hot water in the place at all. It's been a while since I've had a cold shower. Both places I've stayed at whilst I've been away have had the shower in close proximity to the toilet. In this place, the shower actually points at the toilet - time saver!

The beach here is quite shelly in the afternoons, but has sand in the morning. Oh and the syringe I discovered yesterday morning... I have never owned a suit until earlier this year, but that would not have been the case if I had lived in Thailand. I am yet to see anyone wearing a suit here, but the dozen blokes on the way to the beach seem to think it is a necessary requirement to my survival. One suit shop is right at the front door of the place I'm staying at - so I got accosted as soon as I left the hotel for the first time. I tried explaining to the bloke I just wanted to go to the beach, but he wouldn't take no for an answer. This gives me the excuse I need to taunt him with the promise of buying a suit from him. It's the best fun I've had so far. My favourite was telling him I'd be back later, then returning with a tallie and saying "I never do business when I drink".

I didn't bring any board shorts over here, figured I'd buy a stack of clothes just before I leave. I bought a pair of Billabong shorts for 12 bucks. I probably overpaid, but I need something to swim in. My next purchases will be a straw hat and some Ray Bans. If I don't get searched on the way back into Australia I will be very disappointed. Especially considering the hair and beard I'm growing. I figure the scruffier and poorer I look, the less people are going to try to sell me shit.

I wouldn't mind if it was stuff I actually needed, like beer or food. Or a TOT card. The phones here are all TOT which would be great, but no-one sells them. I went into 4 different 7/11's to get one until I found a place that actually sold them. This is my first trip without my mobile on roaming, so not having the ability to make a call when I want to is kinda weird.

I plan to go over to Phi Phi island this morning, it was overcast but is clearing up nicely now. I'd like to get some sunscreen, but the stuff they have here is whitening cream... I don't think I need any of that. The boats going to Phi Phi are dodgy wooden jobs, so I'll see how it goes...

KL

10bastards — Fri, 09 Oct 2009 00:00:00 GMT

Had a brilliant idea to down a bottle of Queensland's finest with a friend. Great Idea, but not before an international flight... I groaned all the way to the airport, but my housemate was probably too tired to care (we left home at 4am). He must have felt a tad soft in the head to agree to that task. It was only when I got to Malaysia that I remembered my difficulty with directions... I managed to get to KL Sentral (the main train/bus station) easy enough, then wandered around trying to think why I didn't write directions to the hostel I had booked down.

I gave up, jumped into a legitimate-looking taxi and hit the road. Old mate the taxi driver took me to the street the place was on. Sweet! Or so I thought. The genius who owns the hostel decided to have two, in close proximity to each other, with the same name, albeit one has "2 after it and one has "1". I eventually gave up looking for hostel 2, which I had booked, and went to hostel 1. They called the other place up, to be informed that because I was late, my room had been sold. Oh well. Got a room at hostel 1, a two person room, so I had to pay double ($20) but it turned out to be great because I really needed the sleep.

I had a little walk after I had rested up and bought a burger from a street-side stall. It was cooked by a little kid who did a pretty good job. I loved how they streched the egg out at this place, wrapping it around the meat patties. The burger had a bucket load of sauce on it as well, which suits me just fine. It cost me a little about $1.50.

I managed to get up in the morning to treat myself to enjoyable "getting lost" walk. I asked the lady at the hostel where KL Sentral was, to which she replied "Down the corner then turn right, then there's some stairs and heaps of people". Using stairs as a reference is a shit idea. I figured out which way KL Sentral was and followed the train tracks there. Made it to the airport without incident and with time to spare!

Don't do your washing in Prague!

10bastards — Sat, 27 Dec 2008 00:00:00 GMT

So it's been almost two weeks since my last pithy comment, again delayed due to lack of internet and time. We made it to Prague via the train. It was a well decked out train, with power-points, so I was able to play Tetris all the way there! Woo hoo.

Prague was not really like I expected it to be. I was thinking of Blade, all dark and gothic. Wasn't quite like that. The beer and food was good quality and cheap which made us both very happy. Our second night there we ventured into the city to try and find some night-life. All we found was drinks three times as expensive as three train stops away. Perhaps the number of stops from the city is indicative of the price of beer! I was reminded of Kabukicho in Japan walking around Prague central. This was because of the large amount of black guys either offering REALLY dodgy money-changing services or a "good" deal on a show. I couldn't wait to get out of there!

We got our hostel to to a load of washing for us the next day while we went to our favourite restaurant around the corner. They treated us like family, it was great! We were about to leave, but the owner gave me a free glass of port. It was so good we bought two each. Then they brought out some snacks for us, and I had my way with their ipod. It was a great afternoon, until we returned to get our washing and found our hostel charged us about twenty times what it would have cost to do. That put me in a great mood for our overnight train to Krakow, that's for sure!

Vienna

10bastards — Wed, 17 Dec 2008 00:00:00 GMT

So instead of Prague we ended up in Vienna! When we inquired about trains, the train went through Vienna, so we figured we would stop there for a night. We had a six seat cabin all to ourselves which was excellent because we could move the seats to make a bed each. I slept really well and woke up looking at the snowy peaks of Austria! Vienna is very nice. I'm not sure how to describe it. It has less antiquities than Rome, but there is kind of a Medieval feel to the place. I am still surprised by the graffiti present in Europe. I know Australia has it's fair share of Graffiti, but we don't have buildings with hundreds of years of history!

The difference from Vienna to Rome was apparent immediately. For a start, in Rome, you RUN across the road before you get taken out. Vienna is very Germanic and organised. Only tourists (especially Italian ones) cross before the little green man (and little green person on a bike!) appears. The street manners remind me a lot of Newcastle in the UK. People pick a line to walk and you daren't step in their way. I got the dirtiest look from a lady today for happening to walk a little too slowly in front of her and her pram. This was after we saw a guy run his shoulder into a young lady. Crazy stuff.

Vienna has the same beggars that Italy had, if a little less dramatic. The beggars here will sit in little alcoves with a cup for money, whereas the Roman beggars will directly confront you for money. I had a guy approach me outside the Vatican saying he was a refugee fro Macedonia and his family needed just 1 Euro cent from me to survive. You can't buy a brass razzoo or a plastic one for one Euro cent. Unbelievable. I'm always a sucker for a battler, but I managed to resist the calling of people apparently down on their luck. We saw a lady and two children (her grand-children I would say) begging on the train. No-one gave them anything. They stopped their crying and wailing and patiently waited for the train to stop at the next station so they could board the next carriage. That kind of put me on the back foot as to their situation. It just seems like a business to most of these people. I'd like to know what the situation with welfare is in these countries, as well as government housing, that sort of thing. Every time we went to an amazing piece of Roman architecture we would prepare ourselves for the assault of people offering us half-price umbrellas or special deals on tours.

I know I sound a little jaded, but I was struck by the immense size and scale of the Vatican, and being a religious place I thought it was horrendous that people would hawk their wares outside. Mind you, every step we took on the way to the Sistene Chapel wasn't too far from a Vatican endorsed gift shop. You can't look at the treasures in the Vatican and listen to a priest talk about empty bellies with a straight face. Unless you've seen the mass of gold, jewels and paintings of inestimable worth in the Vatican you probably wouldn't understand.

All I wanted to see in the Vatican was the Sistene chapel. We went into Saint Peter's basilica first and I was blown away. I wasn't too happy at the amount of people taking pictures though. It was the same as the Pantheon for me. I think grandiose religious places, whether Christian, Jew or Muslim, should be seen as a place of worship not a place for people to gawk at the architectural wonderment and take pictures of the pretty statues. Places of worship are built for the glory of god after all.

Okay, that was probably enough about religion, just had to get that off my chest. We are planning to go to Prague tomorrow, so it's definitely maybe going to happen. We walked all afternoon around Vienna today but I know it wasn't really a good look at what makes Vienna tick. Unfortunately we've only got about a week more to tour around until we go somewhere special for Christmas and then back to the UK for new years.

Roma Tomatoes

10bastards — Mon, 15 Dec 2008 00:00:00 GMT

My first impression of Rome was not great. I couldn't see past the ever-present graffiti on the walls, doors and trains. It's hard to imagine a place so steeped in history and culture as being a working, evolving city.

As soon as we got to the airport we easily found our way to the bus ticket office. Two tickets were bought into town and we were good to go. Until I lost one. It turned out alright though, 'cause Shelley got a replacement gratis. Our first night in the city left me feeling cold about Rome. I seemed to be constantly on the lookout for somebody wanting to mug us!

The next morning we headed to the central train station to see about getting around to see the sights. We decided to join a bus tour. Although we knew it to be expensive (considering a metro ticket to anywhere is two dollars) we only have a day and a half here and it was just easier. We reached our first stop, the Vatican and I duly got my camera out for some happy-snaps. I turned it on and... nothing! I checked inside and there was no bloody battery. We turned around, going back to the hostel to search for it. Couldn't find it anywhere. I checked my backpack again and found I had the battery the whole time! Idiot.

Shelley seemed to take this remarkably well. I think it was from the cold and flu meds she took earlier that morning. We decided to do the Vatican the next morning. We managed to see Trevi Fountain, the Pantheon and the Colosseum. Not bad work for a day's work in the pissing-down rain. We spent about three hours looking for a conversion plug for Italy, but it was well worth it to have dry shoes again (courtesy of Shelley's hair dryer - an essential piece of kit).

We have to figure out our next port of call (most probably Prague) on the morrow. We really have to get a move on - only a couple of weeks to go!

Dublin

10bastards — Sat, 13 Dec 2008 00:00:00 GMT

We spent our first full day in Dublin having a stroll around and looking for a place to stay. Seems like you can't get a room in Dublin on a Saturday night (unless it's double the normal price). We were happy to have found a few good drinking pubs with beer at around six Aussie dollars a bottle which is probably less than Brisbane prices. After checking out the Guinness brewery, having three pints and contracting the hiccups, we decided to have dinner. We found a place offering meals for around fifteen dollars, ordered and sat down with a drink. After an hour we suspected that the staff had lost our order and forgotten about us. We were right. Shelley made an inquiry, only to be told it wasn't the fault of that particular staff member. I tend to get a bit shirty when confronted with shitty service, so we asked for our money back and left.

We wandered around, Shelley being hungry, me thirsty until we satiated our respective needs. On arrival at our hostel we were pleasantly surprised to be in a room with some awesome Aussies and a couple of Spanish girls that had a penchant for stripping. It was nice to speak to some Australians again (the Spanish girls seemed nice also). One of the Aussie girls had her Pj's on which gave me the window of opportunity to wear mine for the first time OS. I was starting to think I shouldn't have packed them... Off we go to Rome tomorrow. I know it will feel a lot different then both the UK and Ireland, so I'm cautiously nervous and optimistic at the same time.

Northern Ireland - sans troubles

10bastards — Fri, 12 Dec 2008 00:00:00 GMT

We discovered the bad part of leaving it until the night before to book flights - they were double the price - still very reasonable though. The bus into the city from the airport was pretty interesting, we sat next to a genial Irish man who had been partaking in a wee bit of the whiskey me thinks. Add to that the fact that our bus driver seemed to have a death wish and we were pretty psyched to actually get off the bus alive.

The first night went without a hitch and when we finally awoke we decided to leave a night early and get started driving around the north coast. Shelley went to try to get the money that I'd payed voluntarily to the hostel for the next night back. She was told that only the price of one bed could be refunded! We decided to stay then which actually worked out pretty well. We organised the next three legs of our trip and got our washing done.

Shelley decided it was my turn to drive. We picked up our Peugeot (automatic, of course!) and I started to look forward to heading into some bendy tight Irish roads. The route we took was breathtaking. I started to doubt the worthiness of much of our traveling in the UK (apart from the Lakes District and Scotland) but this drive is an absolute cracker. We found it ridiculously easy to find a place to stay on the coast. This mightn't seem strange, but in the UK, most of the hostels in the towns we ended up in had closed for winter.

We took our return trip in a roundabout way, going to the small town of Ardboe. This might seem a bit random (it is really), but a wonderful lady I work with is always raving about this town and a pub in it. Shelley was a bit taken aback I think, because I just drove up to a home of someone my workmate had told me to visit. We were invited in without bother, stayed for a couple of hours, then headed to the local for a few pints. Bud (the lady of the house) picked us up and took us to her friend Bernadette's place. Christmas takes on a different dimension in the colder climes I think, and Bernadette's house was a fantastic example. She had a lit nativity scene in her front yard, and every surface seemed to have a Christmas theme. We had food and drink crammed down our throats until we thought we'd burst. Bud took us home around midnight and shared a bed so that we had a place to stay. I was blown away by their kindness to someone they had never met. I can't begin to imagine how much I owe them for such unselfishness. I can see why my workmate keeps the people of Ardboe so close to her heart.

We left Ardboe as the sun rose (around twenty past eight) in order to get our hire car back by ten a.m. We got the car back without a hitch (much to my surprise) to the drop-off point in the centre of Belfast. It was then only a short walk to the bus station and off to Dublin. It was all going well, we found the departure point of the bus, and were ready and waiting for it to arrive. A bus from another company turned up in the bay we were waiting at and we waved as we watched it leave. I hopped around nervously for about ten minutes after the scheduled departure of our bus until I decided to ask a staff member if it was late. It wasn't. Turned out the bus we watched leave was the one we were waiting for. We were told a different company and a different route number! On the up side though, even though we had to wait for another hour, we had a ripper toasted sandwich during our wait.

After settling in to our hostel, we headed off to the Temple Bar district of Dublin for a feed and my first Guinness in the Republic of Ireland. Looking at price lists, we clued on to the fact that finding a meal and a pint for twelve aussie dollars in Temple Bar wasn't going to happen. A pint is ten dollars. Hurts me to my soul that does. We retreated in disgrace to our hostel and found that the area we are in is all priced pretty much the same, due to the number of tourists in the area.

Due to the amount of time we spent in the UK, we have to up and leave for the continent before our holiday runs out of time! This is going to leave Ireland a place that I'm not going to experience to the full. We had planned to go to Cork and to Blarney castle on the morrow, but again we are going to be short of time. It's an eight hour round trip by bus to Cork and we're looking at further travel time to Blarney. To do that we need and extra day, which isn't going to happen now that we've booked our flights. At least I know that I can come back.

Poor Shelley seems to have been plagued all our trip. As well as having a nasty reaction to bed bug bites, she's picked up a cold. This is to go along with her upset stomach and sore back from her backpack. At least it won't be long until Christmas and a well deserved rest.

Catching Up

10bastards — Tue, 09 Dec 2008 00:00:00 GMT

Due to the lack of internet resources and time that I've had available, I've been a bit slack, so I'll try to catch you up. We stayed in Edinburgh for three nights and I must say it is a beautiful city. We took our car up north around a couple of breathtaking Lochs (finding a fantastic park with a flying-fox along the way).

We had gone on a night tour of the old Edinburgh that still exists under the city the night before. Our guide, when finding out that we planned to drive up north on the morrow suggested that wasn't such a great idea. Weather forecasts predicted six inches of snow! We woke up pretty late as per usual and set off, following the signs marked "THE NORTH". We scoffed at the remarks of our guide, as there was no snow on the road and it wasn't icy at all. We did notice a lot of snow alongside the road and days later I read a newspaper saying that there had been six inches of snow, necesitating the closure of two-hundred odd schools in Scotland and Northern England.

We finished off our time in Edinburgh by going on a free pub crawl run by our hostel. It was quite memorable, with very cheap drinks, helping me accomplish my goal of singing "The Gambler" on as many continents as possible. We headed back down through Newcastle-upon-Tyne. The weather was awful for the first time since we came to the UK. This probably added to us not liking Newcastle at all. We left as soon as we could and ended up in York. Shelley was absolutely had it from the drive, so we headed into the nearest pub we could find to find a room.

I was over the hassle of trying to find places to stay, so the next day I suggested to Shelley that we head to her old home town that was about four hours away. She didn't hesitate in the slightest and we made it in record time. We went to the local pub where Shelley used to work. My hands were kept full of free Guinness all night! The locals regretted it as much as I did the next morning. I was well and truly in my element...

The next day was spent slowly recovering, repacking our bags and meeting up with friends for a curry. We booked our flights to Belfast on the same day, finding out at the same time that last-minute bookings are double the price! I wasn't surprised that our first encounter in Ireland was with a drunken reprobate, but that's another story...

Welcoom to Scootland!

10bastards — Tue, 02 Dec 2008 00:00:00 GMT

We stayed in Carlisle, nice and close to Hadrian's Wall, again having to resort to a B&B for shelter. The lady who ran it was really nice and cooked a mean brekky. Unfortunately, Shelley picked up a stomach-bug somewhere and didn't get too much sleep that night. We headed off pretty slowly in the morning and Shelley had peaked up by the time we reached the wall.

I know Australia is an ancient country, but it still feels amazing to be in the presence of man-made objects that are 2000 odd years old. Hadrian's wall doesn't look like much today, but I could still feel the presence of Roman Soldiers there. Well, maybe not, but it wasn't too hard to imagine.

On entering Scotland the landscape changed immediately. The icy plains of northern England were overshadowed by the treed rolling hills of the Scottish borders. We took a scenic route following a meandering river through some breathtaking country. On arrival at Edinburgh we parked at a "park and ride" where, as the name suggests, you park your car and ride into the city (on a bus). Walking down the Royal Mile was a sight to see. Beautiful old buildings on either side leading up to Edinburgh Castle. After checking in at the hostel we went down the street to the most awesome pub! I went to order a beer and a meal and as soon as I showed my hostel pass the lass behind the bar brought out the special hostel menu (meals half price), said she'd bring my drink over to our table and offered to set up a tab for us.

We had an early night due to Shelley feeling crook again, and the Guinness i had drank helped drift me off to a pleasant sleep - until - RIIIIIIIIIIIIP, RIIIIIIIIIIIIIIP!!!! I thought the very fabric of time and space was ripping apart (for a moment I swear the Tardis marterialised in the middle of the room - probably the Guinness there) but it was only two people packing their bags and leaving at three in the morning. Due to my distress over the whole ripping apart of time thing I couldn't go back to sleep, giving me a nice early start to my first full day in Edinburgh.

No soccer hooligans sighted

10bastards — Tue, 02 Dec 2008 00:00:00 GMT

We got to Stratford-upon-Avon on Saturday and had a look around, finding a good pub to eat at and a good pub to drink at. The closest hostel was about eight mile or so out of town, so we booked into a B&B.This started a disturbing trend, as hostels only exist in the summer in many medium sized towns. My budget was suddenly at risk! The pub we found with cheap meals only served them for lunch on Sundays, so we ended up going to Wetherspoon's. This mightn't sound unusual, but we had been to Wetherspoon's (part of a nation-wide chain) of pubs everyday except for our night at Oxford. Needless to say, we're getting a wee bit sick of Wetherspoon's!

After our dinner we headed to a local nightclub, pleased to find it deserted and home of the cheapest drinks we've had in the UK. Here I met an interesting character called Darrell (or Dazza as I called him) and his slightly odd mate. Dazza was a door-to-door salesman (must've been the only bloke in a suit in Stratford) who'd been around a bit by the sounds of him. It was nice to hear some authentic British BS, and his mate was kind enough to chat to Shelley. I thought she would find it a compliment that a fellow wanted to chat to her, but a bloke with wing-nut ears and a flat head who fidgets a lot doesn't rate on an Aussie girl's "hot" list apparently.

Onwards to Manchester and our lack of internet access at the Bed and Breakfast forced us to use the guidebook for Britain that we brought with us. We discovered this guidebook was at least four years old. We got lost in Manchester for two to three hours but made it into town okay and stayed at a pub called Monroe's. The pub had interesting decor, I never realised before staying at this pub how many pictures existed of Marilyn Monroe or that nude pictures of her existed. They do.

Few days later...

10bastards — Fri, 28 Nov 2008 00:00:00 GMT

Had a busy couple of days in London after the last entry, got a fair bit done and saw a lot. I have officially been over, on, under and walked over the Thames. Got that covered! We went to Greenwich which is longitude 0 degrees as well. We met up with my mate Mark in Wimbledon. I now know why he lives there - we saw a kettle-drum band, a Christmas tree that moved on it's own and a bucket load of lightsabres (????). Since we've been n Oxford I've notice no shortage of lightsabres here as well, so it must be a pommy thing. The trippiest thing about the UK at the moment is sunrise and sunset. The sun rises at about 8.30-9am and sets at around 4.30. Should be even less daylight hours as we travel north. The days have been quite nice, brisk but often sunny. One of Shelley's friends lives in Norwich and it's been snowing there, so snowmen here we come!

Had my first brush with the one of the unsavory characters I've always associated with the UK courtesy of The Bill, East enders, Lock-stock et al. We were in Oxford, just driving along, when I glanced at two girls walking along the road. She said "what are you looking at you filthy scrag?". Not her, that's for damn sure. I hate to pigeonhole (not really, I quite enjoy it) but most of the women I have seen fall into a few categories. The usually look a bit like Kate Middleton, Billie Piper or Patsy Kensit (which is definitely not a bad thing!). But CAKED in make-up. Opening a make-up shop in the UK seems like a profitable enterprise, you'd just have to sell in bulk.

The 13 dollar hostel we were in in London was Cheap. Cheap and nasty. The showers should have had biohazard signs up. Every day there was a stagnant pool of water waiting to be sopped up by whatever clothing you were unlucky enough to drop in it. I happened to drop my toothbrush. Needless to say, I stopped using that toothbrush but that didn't stop me from catching a cold. I should be glad I didn't catch anything else I guess. We decided to hire a car to go on the rest of our trip. Because of my lack of a manual licence, (yes Dad, I know) Shelley has to drive us (good - I can pub-crawl). The only problem is she is under 25 (bad - expensive). It's not all bad though. We booked a Fiat Punto (as manly as the name suggests and ended up with a Renault Megane Scenic which is pretty flash murry. We got to oxford no problems at all and should end up in Stratford-Upon-Avon tomorrow, which all you literary fans out there will realise is the former home of William Shakespeare.

Mind the gap

10bastards — Tue, 25 Nov 2008 00:00:00 GMT

Just got back from looking around downtown London. The atmosphere is great. I love the cobblestones, they just seem to add so much character. We got home at about twenty past five, Shelley hit the wall and went to sleep as soon as we got back. We took the Jubilee line from where we're staying (Dollis Hill) into London Bridge, deciding to walk from there. First stop was the Tower Bridge. We then traipsed down to St Paul's Cathedral. I can't believe the size of the bloody thing! We walked back the way we came and had dinner at an Irish pub. Two meals and beers for less than thirty bucks - not too shabby. I decided to take the plunge and see if Guinness really is better over here. The answer - hell yeah! Looking forward to Ireland just to taste it over there. Can't say I've ever been a fan of Guinness in Australia but the stuff here really is good gear.

Shelley bought a sim card for her phone whilst we were out. The salesman was a big black guy with two slits in his right eyebrow (Shelley refused to believe my story that the slits were for the number of people he's killed) and two massive Cubic Zirconia earrings. This guy helped break one of my first aims of being in the UK - going a day without some bastard talking about Neighbors or Home and Away. He didn't shut-up about Home and Away.

The weather was quite nice today. Brisk, yes, but the sun was very bright and I was never freezing cold. The other misconception I had was about how everything is supposed to be expensive here. It isn't. I also figured out why the Pom's enslaved Ireland - Ireland must be full of brick factories, 'cause I swear I didn't see many buildings made out of anything else. Apart from the Ad nauseum repetition of copy-cat houses, the architecture is staggering. We went to a train station where the architect obviously decided to go for looks rather than functionality alone and I'm a big fan of that. London gets my award for the ease of travel through its train system. We purchased an Off-Peak pass for three days, costing about $56 Australian. Seems pretty expensive, but one-way in peak time costs $10, so it's definitely worth it. One of the more peculiar things, I thought, was a station with "mind the gap" emblazoned on the platform, as well as a constant "mind the gap" message played over the PA. We minded the gap. Downtown printed on areas people cross the street are the words "Look Left" and "Look Right". Didn't really work for me, I just kept looking at the ground!

Tomorrow we'll go on a tour of London tower. I love the history involved with it. Shelley might give the ice-skating there a burl as well. We'll meet up with Shelley's friend Abby tomorrow night and I've organised to meet up with my mate Mark on Thursday night. We're either looking at hanging around Wimbledon (his area) or meeting up in the city.

The room in the hostel is nice and warm and the heater is on the wall next to my bed so I'm guaranteed a toasty night.

Made it after 33 hrs or so travelling...

10bastards — Tue, 25 Nov 2008 00:00:00 GMT

Made it to the UK - Phew! Had our bags checked three times - everywhere except Heathrow, believe it or not! Brisbane, Singapore and Abu Dhabi. Travel time was well over 30 hrs! Left Toowoomba at 7.30 Monday morning, got to the UK about 4.30 Australian time Tuesday afternoon. My feet still feel like they've been bitten by a bee, swollen and itchy. Anybody who flies to the UK from Aus on a regular basis deserves a round of applause (or a slap to the face for being so stupid!). We got to the Hostel at 9.30am, only to find it opens at twelve... so we had to find a pub to sit down at - oh well. Had my first real English breakfast at aforesaid pub, costing $6.25! Bloody terrific! A pint was about the same price, which is pretty good.

Back to the plane trip, started off pretty good, entertained myself with the notion that our visit to Singapore was not on the itinerary and being the international man of mystery I am, I could easily drop off the map, so to speak. Back to reality though and the second leg was proving more challenging comfort wise, that was until I had two beers and a baileys - good night! We had to spend three hours in Abu Dhabi airport which wasn't too bad. I just people watched mainly. It seems strange how middle-eastern men just went up to each other and started conversations. One group was sitting around when a bloke pulled out a bag of food. I couldn't hear what they were saying, but I had a guess -

Bloke with dodgy moustache - "Oi fellas, me missus packed me some of this mincy stuff and a shitload of flat bread. You want some?"

Slovenly bloke beside him - "Yeah man, that'd be great"

Later on....

Slovenly bloke - "MMM, great stuff mate. Your missus cooks a mean feed"

Bloke with dodgy moustache - "Yep"

Okay, so that wasn't very exciting, but it filled in some waiting time. I got very tired of having my bag checked and rechecked - three times in all. My impressions of London so far... to be honest, it's like Brisbane with Toowoomba weather and crap paper money (savages). We're heading back into the city soon to try and see something touristy before the day is over.

Ready for action

10bastards — Sun, 09 Nov 2008 00:00:00 GMT

So, going through the motions preparing for our trip. Shelley is taking a far greater interest than I am, I'll be just happy to get there! The tickets were purchased months ago, all we have to organise is travel insurance and we're done. I think Shelley has already packed her bag and I'm pretty sure she'll freak out when she finds out I'm going to pack mine after I finish work the night before. I've never traveled with anyone before, so it will be interesting to see how my "laissez faire" attitude meshes with Shelley's Third Reich style.

I don't really have a list of must-do things. I know I want to go to Europe (pretty sure that will happen), I'd like to go skiing (doesn't matter if I don't) and I'd like to find cheap beer (probably won't happen). I've booked us three nights in London as soon as we get to the UK, and from there we will probably rent a car and go north. I have to deliver a parcel in Ireland (not drugs (I hope)), so that's on the cards as well. After that, we'll go over to mainland Europe, check out Switzerland/Austria/Germany/Czech Republic and crawl up to Norway. All of this will probably cost a bazillion Australian dollars, but I figure the European economies need helping and I'm just the one to do it.

Shelley used to live in the UK, so we're going to see her friends and spend New Years with them. One of my old housemates is in London as well as a family friend from way back, but I'm tossing up whether to commit to meeting up with them now, or just see what happens. Shelley promised me we could organise a game of cricket against her Pommie mates. If that happens I hope to produce my own Larwood-esque bodyline bowling effort. Bwa-ha-ha!

I never thought my life would get to the point where I'd research whether Wool or Polypropylene thermals are the right choice. I have reached that stage unfortunately, and I think I'll go wool, you'll be glad to know. I'm only going to pack a few shirts and jeans and if I need anything I'm sure I'll be able to purchase it over there. I've never lived out of a suitcase for more than three weeks before, but I'll probably survive. I know when I actually get on the plane I'll kick into holiday mode and forget about going to work for the next six weeks. I haven't had a Christmas off work in 5 years, so this one will be a white one, and pretty special.