How Not to Use a Leatherman

There comes a time when you are travelling in Africa that you begin to crave certain items and food types that are not as readily available as you may like. After close to seven weeks on the road my first craving arrived, yet had I known the trouble acquiring it would lead to I think I may have just left it as a craving.

It started out as an innocent pizza run, it ended with a 4x4 stuck on the beach and a security guard nearly being stabbed. I should have seen that the omens were bad right from the start, with both delivery drivers at the pizza place off sick, but instead I let my stomach take control and the eternal quest for a pizza was on, aided by a couple of jolly nice public school chaps from England.

George, who lives in Tanzania, was happy for John, who lives in Bermuda, to drive me to get the pizza in his 4x4, which sounded like a fool proof plan. Wrong. For some inexplicable reason the lights on the truck failed the moment we got back in with a nice warm pizza. This being Africa we didn't think too much off it, after all most cars in Africa run below the required standard of an M.O.T.

Stuck In The Sand

Five minutes later, navigating our way down dirt tracks and through small villages the lack of lights started to become quite a problem, so much so we missed the turning we wanted and before we knew it we were on the beach - stuck in sand. After a few choice expletives from both of us John volunteered to run the last few kilometres and fetch George who would be able to help us out of this, leaving me to eat my pizza on the beach.

As an extra safety precaution, as it clearly says in all backpackers and guide books to avoid being on unlit beaches at night, we locked the car whilst I stood outside eating - this way if anybody came to steal the car it would be locked and John would have the keys. It wasn't quite how I had envisioned eating my pizza, by moonlight on a desolate stretch of beach, but nonetheless I was going to enjoy it.

I was a good three slices in when I saw a figure approaching from the dark, which put me on alert. My mind went from that of a happy pizza eater to a knife wielding killer. Armed with my leatherman I thought if this guy thinks he can just stroll over here and attempt to steal the car he will have to fight me for it, and so I began to advance, slowly, towards him.

My pulse was racing and my hand gripping the knife tight, the figure getting closer, his features starting to become a little more distinguished so that I could almost see the face of my would-be attacker. This was it, I was going to have to stab this man else he would surely steal George's car, and given it was my desire for pizza that had lead to this situation I felt a duty to protect the car.

With the distance between myself and said attacker down to seven metres, and me ready to take a few more steps before lunging in with a killer blow, I suddenly noticed a friendly smile on his face. Another step forward and, with the help of the moonlight, I notice a badge on his shirt that read 'GAC Security'. Suddenly I felt rather stupid, knife still at the ready, as this wasn't an attacker, rather the local security guard seeing if he could help us out of the predicament we had found ourselves in.

Me And The Pizza That Caused The Trouble

Needless to say I hastily tried to conceal the knife, whilst mumbling something about the beach being a dangerous place and it's better to be safe than sorry. Thankfully the security guard didn't realise I was two seconds away from stabbing him, and was more than happy to wait by the car with me until George and John returned to rescue the truck from the beaches clutches.

When Maddie brought me the leatherman I am sure she thought it would be useful in many different ways, but I am almost certain she never once thought, 'this will be perfect for Marcus to stab security guards with on the beach in Mozambique'. It's safe to say that from now on I will be using the leatherman for its many intended uses, of which stabbing people is not one.

written by

MarcusInAfrica on April 9, 2009 from Vilankulo, Mozambique

from the travel blog: Cape to Cardiff

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